My Anxiety Story

I remember going to my first OB appointment when I was pregnant with our first child back in 2009.
He read me the referral my family doctor sent over and asked about my anxiety the doctor had written about on my chart.

I didn't know what he was talking about.

Sure, I was more paranoid than most of the people around me.
I remember being so scared I could barely breathe as a kid, because I was convinced at least 2 nights a week that a "bad guy" had broken into hour home - but I didn't have diagnosed anxiety.
I sure as hell had no idea that it was written on my chart, and I didn't really believe it. 

Fast forward to the first year of our daughter's life and things felt great! .
Sure it was new, and I was exhausted but I finally felt like I knew my purpose in life.
It was hard, no doubt, but I loved all the challenges I faced.

One night, after we had just put our one year old to bed, I was sitting on the couch watching a movie with my husband and I had a tingling sensation go up the side of my neck and into my face.
I dismissed it, but a few minutes later it came back.
I started panicking thinking something was horribly wrong and told my husband to take me to the hospital.

I thought for sure I was having a heart attack.

Luckily, we were living with my dad at the time while our house was being built, so he was home to watch Emma while Louis took me to the hospital. 

They hooked me up to a heart monitor and a few hours later the DR came to see me and told me that what I had just experienced was a panic attack.
He asked me if I had ever experienced one before, and I said "no".
I really hadn't, and to be honest I wasn't convinced that I had just experiened one either.
I wasn't stressed about anything when it happened, so how could it be a panic attack?

I went home that night and continued on with life.
No follow ups with any doctors about my anxiety.

By 2013, we added two more children to our family, and while it was a bit chaotic - I was managing really well.

It wasn't until about 2015 that my anxiety started creeping back.

2015 was a crazy year for us.
We bought an older house in a new city, sold our house the next week, and moved to the new place 2 weeks after that.

I didn't think my anxiety was an issue at the time, but looking back now I can see that it was.
I was constantly on edge, I didn't take my son out to playgroups like I used to take my daughters to, I couldn't sleep well, I would have heart palpitations and have this feeling of just constantly being overwhelmed.

Looking back,  I can't believe I didn't realise how overwhelmed I was.
By the time I was 24, I had three kids (two of whom needed to go to sick kids regularly for their vision), a job where I worked as a support worker for intellectually disabled people (many of whom suffered from their own anxiety disorder), a mortgage while everyone else I knew were still living at home without much responsibility. 

I had a lot on my plate.

I remember dragging all three kids in the car to drive 45 minutes to Sick Kids for a long day where everyone was over tired and just feeling completely exhausted and guilty.
I felt like it was my fault that they had vision problems, which is crazy, but that's what anxiety will do to you.

Those days were super emotional for me. 

Emma hated the drops and usually would scream for a whole half an hour after while I had a 4 year old and 1.5 year old to care for too. 

I should've asked family to take the day off work to come support me, but I had this fear in my head that if I asked for help, people would think I was weak. 

I'm writing this post right now because anxiety is something I suffer with and I am now finally, at 28.5 years old, comfortable to talk about.

It wasn't until very recently that I was actually able to admit to myself that I do, in fact, suffer from anxiety.

So many people experience anxiety and are too scared to talk to others about it in fear of being judged, or in fear of appearing weak. 

I am writing this post right now, because today has been a bad day for my anxiety and on days like today I just feel completely defeated.

I want others going through what I am right now, to know that they aren't alone.

Kelsey,
oxoxo

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Entry Way/ Pantry Makeover on a $200 Budget



I'm so excited to share our recent home project with you guys!
We purchased our open concept back split two years ago and so far we have updated our fireplace on a $10 budget, switched out all the doors and update the living room flooring.
There is a lot of work to be done on this house, but with limited time and money we haven't been able to get done as much as we had hoped, but that's okay!
With the kids all in school, I finally have the time to put some of our own touches on this house to make it really feel like our home.
This house probably isn't our forever home, but I really believe in making your house a home whether you'll be staying a few months or a few years.



You don't have  to spend a ton of money to transform a space.
Trust me, I know it can feel discouraging to have a small budget for home updates but big changes can be made with a small budget!
We dramatically changed the feel of this space with a few pantry baskets, a new mirror and a little bit of black paint!
In total this whole makeover cost us $200!

Paint = $35
Mirror = $60
Pantry Baskets/Jars =$105


BEFORE

 Of course, I have big dreams to rip out that outdated tile but it's just not in our cards right now so I had to be creative and I wanted to be bold with this transformation.
After hours of searching on Pinterest - I decided I wanted to do a black accent wall!
In the past, I have been known to stick with more neutral colours, but something about this house has brought out the decor daredevil in me.
{See Luca's Blue Door HERE}
I decided to paint the small wall off the stairs that faces our kitchen black as it wasn't a huge space, so if it looked horrible it wouldn't be that BIG of a deal to fix haha
Turns out, I loved the black so much that I decided to paint our garage door as well!


What do you think of black paint?
Would you try it in your house?

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Frock Box Review

Happy Friday, Friends!

I am so excited for this post today because it involves two of my favourite things:
1- Getting packages in the mail.
2- Pretty Clothes

A couple months ago, Frock Box, reached out to me and asked if I would be interested in trying out their monthly clothing subscription box and obviously I said YES!

The cool thing about this subscription service?!
They are CANADIAN!
Frock Box is based out of Alberta and ship to women ranging in sizes Small to 3XL.

At the end of this post I have a special coupon code for all my lovely readers that will give you  FREE styling on your first month Favourites but first I want to tell you a bit more about this wonderful company and how the process works.


When you sign up for Frock Box, you fill out a detailed style profile and be paired with a stylist who will select 5 items for you and ship them right to your doorstep!
You try on the clothes in the comfort of your own home, keep what you like and return the rest in the prepaid bag they send you!

Frockbox Favourites is $24.95/month with FREE shipping.
The pieces in the bag range from anywhere between $34-$69 a piece.
If you decide to keep one or more items the subscription fee of $24.95 is refunded, keep all 5 pieces and you get 25% off your orders total!

I love this whole concept because it gives you the chance to fall in love with clothes that you may not have ever given a chance otherwise.
Like this blush toned lace crop top Frock Box sent me below.
I would never in a million years pick out a crop top for myself but I am absolutely in love with it!

Enough talking though!
I'm going to share photos of the pieces Frock Box sent me below.




 I am a HUGE fan of the lace crop top like I mentioned above and I will be keeping the booties that you can see pictured in the first photo of this post.
The Pants are a little bit too tight so I will be sending those back and I am torn between which sweater I want to keep - I may end up keeping both!

Here is the code I promised you above:

KELSEYDIANEBLOG

I'd love to hear if you try Frock Box out and let me know what you think!


Kelsey,
oxoxox



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Keto Approved Egg Pizza



A few of my friends are on the keto diet and absolutely swear by it!
I gave it a try a couple weeks ago, and while I discovered that such a restrictive diet is not right for me, I had to share this delicious Keto approved pizza I made and fell in love with.
This is also a great pizza for anyone on a low carb or gluten free diet.


Ingredients
1 Tablespoon Butter
2 Large Eggs
1/4 Cup Salsa
1/4 Cup Marble Cheese
5 Pepperoni
Italian Seasoning

Directions
1. Melt Butter in frying pan over medium high heat.
2. Crack eggs in pan and let them cook for 10 minutes.
3. Once eggs are starting to set pour the salsa over top
4. Turn heat to low and add cheese and pepperoni on top. 
5. Sprinkle italian seasoning on top.
6. Cook until the peperoni is cooked and cheese is melted.
(about 5 minutes)
7. Enjoy!!


I hope you guys love this pizza as much as I do!
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Striped Sleeve Top



 
I'm sitting here typing this next to the fireplace under the coziest blanket I could find.
The cool crisp air is FINALLY here and I am so happy about it.
It is supposed to get up to almost 20 degrees celcius later on today though, so this weather is a bit tricky to dress for!
This morning I walked the kids to school in a coat, mitts and hat but by the afternoon I won't even need a jacket.
My favourite outifts for this time of year are simple ones.
A basic long sleeve tee paired with a pair of skinny jeans is my go to outfit.
I'm loving this striped long sleeve tee from Pink Blush.
I like the extra detail the stripes on the sleeve gives this basic tee.
The shirt has extra length too which would make this perfect to wear with a pair of leggings and high boots as well.

 **This is a sponsored post which means I was provided compensation and/or product for this post. As always, all thoughts and opinions are 100% my own. **

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My Cozy Fall Day Playlist



Music is a huge part of my life so I thought it would be fun to share some of the music I'm currently listening to.
I actually am writing this post for the second time because I accidentally deleted the original post.
I made this playlist to listen to on a cool Fall Day where you feel like staying indoors with a warm cup of coffee curled up on the couch under the coziest blankets.
Click here
to listen to my Fall Playlist and let me know what you think :)


Kelsey
oxoxox



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